People would like to think that the island of Lanai is a snapshot of old Hawaii. It’s not. Old Hawaii was not acres of pineapple fields. Fortunately, that’s not the new Lanai, either. The old Hawaii wasn’t crowded with hotels and resorts. Neither is the new Lanai. In fact, there’s not much here. Not even a stop light.

There’s just not enough traffic to warrant the use of electricity, I guess. Still, Lanai has a charm all its own. That charm is put to good use at The Lodge at Koele.

The lodge is located upland on Lanai. Actually, just about everything is upland on Lanai because there’s not much lowland. A mountain ridge runs through the center of the island with towering cliffs overlooking Molokai and Maui—nature’s version of a leather bikini top on Pamela Anderson (of Tommy Lee and Stripperella fame). Snug and tight—but you’re sure something is going to break loose and fall any minute.

Life is not that tense at the Lodge, though. You’d swear you were in Switzerland in summer—except someone took away all the snow covered mountains. There’s the traditional English country manor (isn’t it cool how I went from Switzerland to England in just two sentences?) amid more lush greenery than a Republican fund raiser featuring George Bush and Mini-George Bush.

Inside the Lodge is the Great Hall—high-beamed ceilings, magnificent twin stone fireplaces, live music and cultural events, and an art collection of world class—paintings, sculptures, and artifacts of antiquity (yes, I’m certain Burt Reynolds and Loni Anderson stayed here).

The suites are large and feature hard-carved beds, ceiling fans, oil paintings by local artists, and views of the countryside—no ocean in sight.

Once you’re settled in, there’s only two things left to do. Well, three, if you like wrinkled sheets.

ONE – outdoor activities: golf (when it’s not raining), hiking trails (when it’s not raining), mountain biking (when it’s not raining), lawn bowling (when it’s not raining) horse back riding (when it’s not raining).

TWO – indoor activities: eating (restaurants are first class and serve fresh dishes of island seafood, poultry (range chicken) and local game. Reading (there’s a library with a large selection of classics), and horseback riding (how the sheets get wrinkled and stay that way).

After that, there’s not much more to do at the Lodge at Koele so it’s necessary to go elsewhere. Fortunately, a shuttle bus arrives every hour to take you on a lovely tour through Lanai City. You’ll see the post office, the stop signs, the general store, a few houses, Hotel Lanai (eat there, don’t stay there—it smacks of the Bates Motel—leave before dark and don’t take a shower after your meal).

From Lanai City, the shuttle bus will venture across what used to be fields of pineapples (an old song by Bob Seeger; once he changed the name it because a hit) and head toward Manele Bay—which is conveniently both a bay and a resort hotel on the bay.

I’ll save that for a later review as Manele Bay’s resort and the Lodge at Koele are a couple of worlds apart—maybe a time dimension, too.

All in all, the Lodge is worthy of a visit if you’re really interested in getting away from it all.

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