OK, this being the Internet and all, I’m going to turn you on to a web site about the Garden Isle of Hawaii—Kauai. Of course, there’s information about the other islands, but the page I found in Google.com appears to be on Kauai and that’s my category for the day. Good match, huh?

What’s interesting about the site is the name. RoyalElephant.com. Now, I don’t know how you handle pesky garden animals, school yard rodents, and the occasional jungle animal, but I use my Handy Dandy, A-Number One, Triple Distilled, Type AAA Super Strength Elephant Repellent. It’s a family recipe and I’ve used it for years.

There are no wild elephants in Hawaii.

OK, there’s one in the Honolulu Zoo but I’m not responsible. Kids need to grow up knowing what larger rodents look like. Alright, stop winking. Yes, there are some elephantine folks on the beach soaking up Hawaiian Tropic Coconut Oil (SPF 275) by the quart, but it’s an entirely different species.

There are no Royal Elephants in Hawaii so why do we have a web site called, RoyalElephant.com?

Good question.

I’m thinking, uh, India. Elephants carrying tourists through the jungle. Elephants carrying “royalty” through the jungle. Royal Elephant.

Except the topic is Hawaii (specifically, Kauai). Not India (or wherever else there may happen to be royal elephants).

Here’s the skinny on RoyalElephant.com straight from the About Us link:

“Why” is it “Royal Elephant?”

“The first elephant arrived in Hawaii in December 1860. He was a circus elephant named “Prince Albert” and he amazed everyone in the islands. Prince Albert made such an impression in Hawaii that it was suggested that the islands change their method of recording calendar years from B.C. and A.D. to “before Prince Albert” and “after Prince Albert.”

“Needless to say, that didn’t happen, but it just goes to show just how much of an impact the royal elephant made.”

“Prince Albert was named after Queen Victoria’s husband. The real Prince married Queen Victoria in 1840, but because Prince Albert was only a minor German prince, the British Parliament snubbed him. Instead of confirming a kingly title upon him, they dubbed him the “Prince Consort.”

So, there was an elephant in Hawaii a long time ago. I don’t know about you, but my brother and I used to call up the local drug store using our deepest adult voice, and ask, “Say, do you have Prince Albert in a can??”

The store clerk would usually pause, check the tobacco stock, and reply, “Why, yes. We have Prince Albert in a can.”

To which we’d reply, “Well, you’d better let ‘em out of the can. He might suffocate in there!!”

Then we’d giggle and laugh and guffaw (something you didn’t know you did as a kid until you became an adult), hang up the phone and try something else that was stupid. But fun.

No, this has nothing to do with Kauai—which does NOT have any elephants. It has to do with a web site about Kauai—and Hawaii.

Commercialism has crept into everything on the Internet these days. Seemingly pleasant little web sites like RoyalElephant.com, ostensibly existing to supply keen readers like you with the latest about what’s happening in Hawaii, are just as commercial as anyone.

Straight from the Elephant’s mouth:

“We try to pay for our Web space with the banner links on the site. These banners go to the best online travel service sites, where you can get tickets to Hawaii, rent a car in Honolulu, or get some Hawaiian travel books and maps.”

“When you click on one of those banners and buy something, the company pays us a few cents of the sale because you clicked our link and then visted their online store. But they only pay a commission if you bought after going directly from our site to theirs, so please remember to come here and then shop happily.”

Hey, they’re honest about it. Give ‘em credit for that. You can help out the folks who run that site by clicking all over the place so they’ll get an extra 27-cents this month.

Want to know the best places to eat in Hawaii? Click over to Ono Dining for totally biased reviews on Hawai's best (and not so best) restaurants.