Beauty, as they say, is in the eye of the beholder. I can understand a Top 5 Beaches list with only one, just one, Hawaii beach. After all, why should we want to hog the spotlight all the time, when simply ‘most of the time’ will do?

Green beaches? Romance? Get real.

WeddingChannel.com has an Editor’s Top Pick which lists the Top Five Most Romantic Beaches. Of course, the criteria makes a difference, although color of sand obviously isn’t much of an issue—beach amenities and romantic location seems to be more important.

Number One on the list is a beach at Bora Bora in Tahiti. This is pure beach, baby. Not much to do but stroke each other and the occasional manta ray floating by. Sand is pristine. Water is crystal clear.

Number Two is the famous Pink Beach in the Bahamas. No list of beaches would be complete without a beach in the Bahamas. That’s as close as most Lower 48 State folks will get to a beach that’s non-Hawaii. It’s more of a soft-shelled pink, though.

Number Three is Nice, France. The water is so-so, the beach is a bit mundane, but it is the French Riviera—topless and all. Hey, “topless” would get sunbathers on a parking lot in Muncie, Indiana on the Top 5 list. This is nothing but atmosphere surrounding the beach—not the beach itself.

Number Five is South Beach, Florida. Again, the only reason for this one making the cut is the fact that it’s a beach you can drive to from the continental US. It’s the ONLY beach you can drive to from the US.

Now for the green beach.

Yes, Virginia. There is a green beach. And it’s in the US. No, you can’t drive there unless you fly there first. It’s the Green Sand Beach on the Big Island of Hawaii. WeddingChannel.com had the audacity to park this beach at Number Four on the list of most romantic beaches.

Why?

If you’ve been there, maybe the question should be re-phrased—“Why did it rank so high?”

First, Hawaii (the island) must have eleventy seven beaches that are better in every beach respect; though not many green ones.

Second, you have to hike three miles just to get to the beach. Three miles? How romantic is that?

Nice sandy beaches are a dime a dozen. White sand beaches are much less common. Pink sand beaches are rare. Green sand beaches (sans New Jersey-like EPA-neglected beach sludge dumps) are the rarest of rare.

Green Sand Beach on Hawaii is made up of olivine—it’s a rare crystal found in nearby Kilauea volcano. Sounds hot, huh?

The water is crystal clear blue—that deep, rich royal blue. White foamy waves crash on a bright green sandy beach.

How cool is that? Perfectly romantic if you’re naked.

Want to know the best places to eat in Hawaii? Click over to Ono Dining for totally biased reviews on Hawai's best (and not so best) restaurants.